News: What are the 7 major stages of female sexuality? The learning of sexuality begins very young and evolves over the course of life, punctuated by pivotal moments. Update with Céline Causse *, psychiatrist, psychoanalyst and sexologist.

1. Self-discovery In utero, we observed female fetuses of thirty-two weeks caressing the vulva and the clitoris with the hand and observed a set of physical reactions close to those of an orgasm, explains the sexologist straight away. “An exploratory activity which will continue, she specifies, in some babies of over 6 months, by tightening movements of the thighs or by friction. Then, later, around 3-5 years old, through sexual games with children of the same age, like the doctor’s. Then comes, at 6-7 years old, a phase of modesty that will last until pre-adolescence, around – 12 years and, again, renewed interest toward 13-14 years at the time of adolescence. ”

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A period when young girls will discover masturbation in its adult form. A way for them to explore their body and their sexuality to experience orgasm. A rewarding solo adventure before meeting the person worth getting started with.

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2. Discovering the other Seventeen is the average age of first sexual intercourse for young people, both women and men. Then begins a long phase of learning sexuality for two, without giving up the pleasure that we get on our own.

“It is a complicated period where they will sometimes have difficulties to place themselves in their own sexuality, to understand and learn what they like or not, to assume it in the face to standards imposed more or less by society, the media and the images conveyed by pornography ”, insists Céline Causse.

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But it is also a stage made up of multiple experiences where sexuality is recreational, freer and centered on his pleasure and that of the other. “Without doubt less heteronormous since, today, 14% girls aged 14 years old say they are bisexual ”, the specialist. And to add that there are many who remain eternal romantics in search of the ideal partner.

3. In a passionate relationship The soul mate, which everyone dreams of, eventually arrives. “We project ourselves into the future, and everyday life is then akin, according to Francesco Alberoni, Italian sociologist, in a state of love where sexuality is extraordinary. All the neurotransmitters involved in desire, pleasure, and well-being are at their peak. We are overwhelmed with hormones, emotions, desires, obsessed with the other. You can make love three times a day ”, continues Céline Causse.

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A passionate state which, according to the couples, will last from three months to three years. As the sex therapist explains: “The whole challenge, to get out of this fusion and stay the course, is to recognize the otherness of the other, to accept it with its faults, its qualities, to adopt a cruising speed and approach a new part of its history together. ”

4. In a lasting couple In a serious and stable emotional relationship, the female libido is often on the decline. Being reassured, in total confidence, can sometimes lead to a decrease in libido in women.

What matters then above all to awaken his desire, are marks of attention and tenderness on the part of their spouse. As Céline Causse affirms: “The longer the couple lasts, the more complicated it becomes to have a fulfilling sexuality. There is the daily mental load and professional life, which often takes over. It is therefore important to be present and to listen to the other. ”

It is still a time for two, where sexuality can be serene and complicit before the arrival of this great upheaval: the birth of a child.

5. Waiting for baby Usually, when pre-pregnancy sexuality was good, there is no reason why during these nine months, the sensuality should not be there. The body obviously undergoes changes. Emotionally, the mother-to-be is more concerned with this baby growing inside her, so less concerned with trifles.

“Except for the second trimester, there is an overall decrease in desire and frequency of intercourse. It is, in fact, a period filled with emotions, punctuated by fears for yourself, your baby and this parenthood in the making. But it is also, and too often, still linked to all these fears and false beliefs anchored in the collective unconscious ”, protests the doctor.

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And to recall: “No, making love does not cause miscarriage or premature childbirth; no, it doesn’t hurt the baby. » On the contrary, it is recommended throughout pregnancy with the adaptations and desires that are required over the months. Namely: more mutual caresses, more oral sex and less penetration.

6. When the child appears Crucial moment in the couple’s life, punctuated by eventful nights, a messed up daily life, a body that is slowly recovering from this event and a low libido. “It is inevitably a period of transition on a family, social and emotional level. Being a parent changes the place of sexuality in the couple, requires a psychic reorganization. The young mother, fulfilled by her child, may no longer have sexual desire ”, relates Céline Causse.

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Difficult in these conditions to find the couple in love at the birth of the parental couple. It is a matter of time, more or less long, according to the stories of each one. “But, there again, the more sexuality was fulfilled before and during pregnancy, the more it will be fluid and just as satisfying after” , insists the specialist.

7. At the dawn of a new life The years go by, the children leave the nest. Between and 55 years, female sexuality is at its peak. She blossoms, sometimes, in a new love affair, when this obligatory and dreaded passage occurs: menopause. “Let’s stop saying it’s the end, storms the sex therapist. Those who have kept or regained regular intimate contact experience less of the negative effects. There are, of course, these bodily changes, which can lead to vaginal atrophy and dryness, and drop in hormones, which can lead to low libido. But whatever the problems encountered, you should talk to your doctor, because solutions exist. ”

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And, according to Céline Causse, it’s worth it, because sexuality will be more sensual, more tender, less penetrating, with a large part devoted to caresses and foreplay and without age limit. No matter if the orgasm is usually longer in coming, the pleasure is deeper, probably different, but just as satisfying. And to cite, to conclude, the example of this sexually active woman who, at 68 years, is in love with a young 55 years old

Female sexuality in all its antics, Fayard.

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